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Women, we have a lot to learn from Rui.

08 Mar 2017

Like every day, I stood by the door and asked my husband, ‘when will you come home?’

Like every day, he kissed my forehead and said, ‘will try to be back at early as possible.’

Like every day, I knew his ‘early as possible’ will not be before 10 o clock at night.

 

Rui chuckled softly to herself as she read through her diary in the early days of her marital life. She was an architecture major, born and brought up in Delhi, along with being an exceptional cook. When time came for her to be married off, her resume was lucrative enough to catch the eye of Ankush’s family, who were well to do in themselves along with Ankush being an OCA settled in New York.

The only experience Rui had about New York was from the movie Kal Ho Na Ho, and marred with SRK’s romanticism, it seemed to her to be the best place to be. She hoped to gain a best friend for life in Ankush, and weaved a lot of pink and golden dreams of their life together.

 

The real Ankush was a different guy from her imagination. He was loving and caring, smart and witty, who had a vibrant life of his own.

Being there for nearly a decade, he had a lot of friends there, irrespective of genders and loved to hang out with them.

His typical routine comprised of his day job, a digital security firm followed by regular clubbing in one place or the other with his buddies.

It was not that Ankush wanted to keep her out of it; rather, he proactively wanted her to join his style of life. Rui tried; but the music was too loud, and the people talked too much but rarely spoke --- or so she felt. All in all, Rui realized it was not her.

She didn’t enjoy jazz or electric rock, she didn’t see the bottoms up contest as projection of prowess, and was utterly uncomfortable in the dance floor.

She shared her misery with Ankush.

In spite of it being an arranged marriage, it was a mark of the strength of their relationship that he did not take it adversely. He rather tried to go out with her on dates, movies and solo dinners; but it seemed to be too slow for his taste. He didn’t really enjoy it much and got bored, Rui could see it etched in the lines of his face.

 

So, they talked. It seemed none could gel with the others’ life style, and so Ankush was left to continue with his clubbing alone, while Rui stayed back home.

She tried recipes for the first few days, and Ankush loved them too; she went to local libraries and took to roaming about the city o her own, but then, the novelties were short lived and the days too long. Rui felt lonely and low, often thinking how her life could come to this?

Wasn’t she the girl who won most of the debates at college? And had the best yearbook? Wasn’t she this vivacious girl who was loved and admired by all? Was this her fate?

Being stuck in this New York apartment till her hair turns grey with loneliness and all hope of having a happy life leaves her heart?

 

It seemed odd at time that she would suffer like this, when every other woman around her had similar lives and seemed to be enjoying it.

The girls she met at the supermarket were rather happy that their husbands had a life of their own.

‘Is it possible to cater after them all the time?’ they would say, ‘don’t we have anything better to do?’ no, she actually didn’t have anything else to do here in this not yet familiar place.

She looked at her house, decorated with taste and elegance. She was often appreciated and praised for her aesthetic nature, and people often asked her to make a business out of it. She laughed off every time.

 

She broached the topic a couple of days later to Ankush after he came home, she wanted to start a business of renovating old places and selling them off, along with interior décor. She thought Ankush will not agree to it, but somehow he was happy that she wanted to do something productive with her life. He helped her get the start up loan, even provided her with a few business contacts.

 

A year down the line, Rui was a successful entrepreneur having 10 people working under her. She started small, but boomed in a little while. Presently she and Ankush were thinking of merging their business partially, as renovation and digital security made great partners.

They had worked together a couple of time on client demands and met with huge success, and well, more money. As she browsed through her old diary, she felt it was someone else’s thoughts, someone vulnerable and unsure of herself; something she is completely not.

 

Women, we have a lot to learn from Rui. She could have succumbed to desolateness and despair, and she could have left the relationship and ran back home. She didn’t do either. She took the step to take charge of her life, and look what life gave back to her. Caring for the spouse and family is okay, but that is not the sole purpose of life. This women’s day, let us take the pledge to care for ourselves first.

 

If you are facing depression,anxiety or relationship issues then help is right here at www.ePsyClinic.com.  

 

 

 

 

 

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Tags: #Woman #Successful