Married to a Man or a Mom's son : Natasha's Struggle as a wife
23 Aug 2016
A man is entitled to take care of his family and his attachment to his mother is perspicuous. After all a mother is responsible for everything that her son has. A man should always respect the sanctity and bonding with his mother and give her the importance and priority which she deserves.
However, when this relationship between a mother and a son goes extremely interdependent, it starts to affect other equally important relationships such the relationship between a man and his wife. And both the relationships are affected.
A very common cause of marital discord is when the wife starts to feel that “I am married to a mamma’s boy” .
“I came to marry a man, who was supposed to take care of me and his family of course as much I was supposed to take care of him, who I thought will love me and that his family too will dote on me but I got married to a mama's boy.
He has no say to what his mother tells him, almost ignores everything I say, I am always made to feel like I am an intruder between their space.
It started with him commenting on my cooking and constantly comparing my cooking skills with his mothers.
Then the other things, I began to notice was that he calls her throughout the day from office or she calls him and his constant need for being pampered by his mother and craving for her attention like a small boy caught my attention.
At the beginning I thought, maybe, he is still to adjust to the fact that he is married but all that didn’t seem to stop. My opinion didn’t matter at all.
For that matter even my husband’s own opinion didn’t matter so much, he almost didn’t have a mind of his own when around his mother.
I just don’t know where to fit in. He almost didn’t need me for anything. He wouldn’t even share anything with me but would do that with his mother. At some point I think he expects me to baby him too.
When I refuse, his mother is anyway there to do that. This relationship between him and his mother has really started to affect my mental health and my feelings towards our relationship.
I have have begin to question myself about the man I have married and this marriage altogether.”
Natasha came to us distressed with the above concern. She was felt helpless about being a wife of a mama’s boy. It can be very distressful on the part of the wife. A wife has left her home to be a companion of thick and thin for her her husband but then, she starts doubting her own existence because her husband is still so involved with his mother making the wife left out.
Marriage psychologist helped her overcome this problem by targeting the right parts of her relationship with her husband and help to pull her husband out of the cocoon. This worked out eventually and her husband now knows his responsibilities and is a good companion to Natasha.
An atypical relationship between a mother and son can push women to emotional health issues and marriage in jeopardy.
There is a fair difference between genuine parental love and care and being obsessed with parent.
The umbilical Cord gets cut as soon as we are born for a reason. Have independent healthy relationships for true happiness!
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Tags: #mumma'sboy #dependent