An open letter to my Family (IN LAW)
20 Aug 2016
My So Called Home
I never thought my married life is going to be like one of those shown in the movies, but I certainly knew I have the capacity to give and earn love.
My parents treated me like a princess, my grandparents like a doll and my extended family always thought very highly of me so I had all reasons to believe that I will build positive relations in my new house as well.
But unfortunately all my dreams were shattered when I came in my so called new home!
The house which I thought would be my new house! It all began there.. I never wanted to change all that you have made in all these years, but I am a human too with some needs- please try and hear me once.
Your son is a gem, and you truly have given me the most priced possession of your life.. But was I any less to my parents? We are perfect for each other! I have left my house for him, atleast let him spend one hour a day with me?
If we both come close, the last thing that would cross my mind is to tell him to stay away from you.. Also he's an adult and would never do anything against you all.. So please if not me have the faith in your son.. And as far as I am concerned .. I wouldn't like anyone doing that to my parents so why would I do that to you?
When I got married I was excited that I'll have another family- and i was ready to accept you whichever ways you all were.. You wore sari and I thought you looked stunning in one just because that's what you liked, my dad never wore a kurtapyjama, but when dad here wears it I respect it.. I don't enjoy the way we cook here but I have adapted to that as well! But am I that bad that I need to change everything about me.. From my clothes, to my eating style, to my friends and my job and still feel not wanted?
If you ask me today, yes I don't see you as a family because what I knew of family was love and respect none of what I got here. I was told family provides unconditional love but here even after changing myself to another person today whom even I don't recognise, I still haven't felt warmth.. When was the last time you asked me if I had eaten something? Or how was my day at work or how my folks were doing? You have always wanted me to work in the kitchen but have you ever asked me if I ever wanted any help? Did you ever ask me if I want to make my room my way?
I know you are not my parents and can never even replace them, but trust me had I given my parents even half the respect I give you all, they probably would have been on cloud 9 today.
I don't expect a lot out of you all, just if you want me to respect you please respect me too.. If you want me to take you to the doctor, please take care of me when I am ill, if you want me to be your daughter, try and be my parents, if you want me to make this home mine, make me a part of this home.
You give me 10% and I assure you, you'll have my 100%!
Please treat your daughter in laws/your wife with the same love she got in her home.
Think and lets change for a happier life.. Early marriage transition can be so tough on the woman. Never ignore.
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