A to be Father: His anxieties are never heard.. He is an unsung hero!
29 Apr 2016
Deepa broke the news of her conceiving to Rajesh as soon as he returned from office. He was overjoyed for a minute but suddenly lostthe happiness on his face with a quiet glum look.
For the next one month he was in the same state : sad, tensed and also had physical complains of headache and high bp.
Deepa was shocked at this reaction and was worried about her husband for the same time so she contacted us. When we first connected with Rajesh we had not expected him to break down like a baby and cry for the first 5 minutes in the session...and then he opened up the pandora box of worries that were troubling him..the biggest worry being would he be able to manage the finances to give his wife a healthy pregnancy experience and even bigger, meet the rising expenses post the baby was born.
This situation is today experienced by many men especially where they have no additional financial support coming in.
Entering parenthood is a beautiful moment but there is no denying that if some planning-especially for finances and physical support at home, begins before conception or even by the first trimester of pregnancy , it can be a pretty enjoyable and relaxing experience then.
When a couple makes the decision to embark on parenthood, they need to be prepared for big changes - financially, career-wise, emotionally and with time commitments.
So here's how you can help yourself enjoy fatherhood without facing any speedbrakers.
1) One of the big changes for men moving from enjoying life as a bachelor to a couple to a father involves the financial demands and challenges. To plan effectively you first need to learn what to expect financially when you become a father and what to do about it. Issues can range from losing income due to cutting back hours to managing the costs of child care, medical care and other family expenditures - having a child is a big decision.
Make a realistic budget that reflects your new lifestyle and track your spending. If your housing and other costs have increased owing to your growing family size, make a new monthly budget that reflects those added expenses. Rome wasnt build in a day so give yourself time to master budgeting and planning.
2) Work with your anxieties and feelings : It's natural to feel left out when your partner is pregnant. The pregnant woman's attention will be on what's happening inside her and this may make you feel ignored and unloved or even lonely. So talk about this with your partner, join prenatal or antenatal classes with her, keep reading about what to expect in each trimester so as to enjoy every moment in an informed way.
3) Dont worry about the future. Just do what is right without worrying excessively or holding yourself guilty. Buying 15 toys instead of 100 toys is as good and thus dont over burden yourself with demands of luxury. Your love for your family is worth a million Bucks so relax!
And if you are unable to manage your worries or anxieties about the financial planning or feel sad or depressed about not being able to adjust to changes in your relationship with your partner due to her carrying a baby inside her or worrying about her and baby , then speak with a professional counselor or psychologist to help glide through this phase with more confidence and happiness.
Just click the pink chat button and Type "Papa to be" to start instant consultation or to know more about process and charges of consultation
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Tags: #fatherhood #parenting