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Treating women secondary is the norm and it is surely unhealthy!

03 Jan 2016

“I am a branch manager at a leading National Bank. I make major decisions at work on a daily basis but when it comes to making decisions at home my opinion does not matter. It has shaken my confidence as it seems that my in laws and my husband doubt my ability to even take minor decisions at home. I feel hurt and bruised. It has now started taking a toll on my decision making skills at work. I am no more as confident as I used to be, in fact I feel like a nervous wreck. I feel so worthless.” Say 28 year old Simi. She is now taking therapy for mild depression.

Women have excelled in every field, they have reached the moon, they are CEO’s, have active combat roles, you name it and they are there. They are achievers! Educated, independent and financially strong is how women of today see themselves. They have it all. Lets rethink this….While women are at the forefront in the outer world nothing much has really changed around them in their homes.

They still have a secondary position.

They earn but still look towards their husbands to make small purchases, they make huge decisions in their work place but at home need to seek permission to do things in a particular way. So what change are we really talking about! When a couple walks into the house after a day’s work, the man gets to plonk himself in front of the TV but the woman is expected to attend to household chores. She now has responsibilities both inside as well as outside the house and there seems to be no negotiations. People are quick to point when a woman cannot make round roti’s or cannot cook and make her feel miserable about having achieved nothing. It is rear for a woman to be appreciated for her achievements outside the house.

With unending responsibilities and very scarce appreciation more and more women report of symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress. There is anger and frustration brewing within them. Most women with emotional and psychological concerns report of having less or no support on the home front. 


In most families women are treated as secondary in the following areas

Religious ceremonies

During meals

Financial matters

Family decisions

Property ownership

Respect at home


Symptoms indicating frustration among Women

Being snappy & Anger outburst

         Being over sensitive & Emotional outbursts

Irritability & Concentration Issues 

Sadness & Discontentment


For Women

One tip we have for you as that you need to stop the wrong around you as a mother, for self, for sisters, for women around!

Women need to stop giving the onus of their happiness to people around. If you feel stifled in relationships as you feel secondary to the man in the house.


For Men

Our tip is for once try and be in a woman's shoes. She is doing everything like you still is being treated differently. How would you feel if the society turns as a bully to you! Be the change, empower women around you!


However if the pain has been deep seated and this torture been inflicted on you for too long as it may have caused you mental or emotional hurth then It is time that you seek help and break the shackles and be second to none.

If you can relate Simi’s story…Here is how we can help you through

Counseling and Therapy

1.Define and reach Wellness Goals: A psychologist will help you identify key areas that need to be worked upon and also help you with the ways in which mental wellness goals can be achieved.

2.Helping you cope with Stress: Counseling will help you prioritise things in your life and thus cope better both at home and also at work also reducing the stress.

3. Assertiveness Training: The need to assert yourself is sometimes inevitable, failing to do so makes you feel taken for granted and emotionally vulnerable.

4.Overcoming your fears and insecurities: Mostly women take a passive role due to the impinging fears and insecurities. Counseling and therapy helps you clear your mind and enables you to make sound judgements.

5. Understanding things that bother you and how to deal with them: There might be irritability or frustration within you for reasons that you might not be able to identify. This irritability may have much deeper roots. A psychologist helps you to identify those and assists you to cope with them in a more effective manner.

6. Giving a positive outlook: Counseling changes your outlook. You start looking at situations in a positive light and thus feel good about yourself.

7.Enhancing relationships: With the help of counselling and therapy one can stabilise relationships and also find happiness in them.

8. Enhance Self Dependence: Taking charge of your own life is important. Counseling helps you overcome the feeling one has about the inability to function without someone.


Women need to stop giving the onus of their happiness to people around. If you feel stifled in relationships as you feel secondary to the man in the house. It is time that you seek help and break the shackles and be second to none.

If as a woman you are struggling and this has been causing you tremendous mental agony and pain, you can get

complete help Online from ePsyClinic’s Depression & wellness Psychologists and Experts. Through Joint sessions

and Individual sessions with the partners,’s experts have helped 1000’s of couples.

Just Click the GREEN chat Button on the left and “Type Hi” to get started and know more

Take a free depression assessment here


To know more about ePsyClinic's e-Mental wellness specialty clinic. 



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About ePsyClinic: We are an Indian health company that is now Asia's largest Online Clinic for Mental, emotional, professional and pregnancy wellness. We have India's top psychiatrists, gynecologists on our panel along with most professionally trained psychologists. Our experts’ receive special training for an effective online management and treatment of various mental health, emotional health, pregnancy health and addiction issues.

Tags: #modern woman #depression #frustration