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I don't feel like doing it: Tips for women after delivery to overcome this feeling!

21 Aug 2015

For a lot of new moms sex is a thing of the past. You neither have the time nor the energy and sex becomes a last priority. Well most of you may have been avoiding it by making some excuse or the other or by just telling your spouse that you are not up for it. You may feel pressurised and irritated at your partner’s advances. This may further make you guilty of not acknowledging your partner’s sexual expectations. 

As the body goes through my physical and hormonal changes women post pregnancy stop feeling attractive enough and have a negative body image. Some women find it extremely hard to switch roles between a ‘mother’ and a ‘lover’ almost at the same time.

If you feel that sex is no more for you… on!

 Here are some difficulties that you may face in you post pregnancy sex life:

1.      Low Libido: You may feel that you have no desire or drive for a sexual activity. You don’t feel up to it as you are tired and drained out because of the various caregiving activities throughout the day.

#Suggestion: Get a help around the house. Avoid wasting your energy doing things that others can do for you. Delegate specific tasks to whoever is willing to help.

This will help you to get adequate rest and recoup quickly.

2.      Fear of Pain: You have just gone through child birth. It is advisable to not have penetrative sex for the first 40 days after delivery as your uterus is still recovering and your vaginal passage could be sore. You should let yourself heal completely.

#Suggestion: Cuddle, caress or snuggle. Tell your spouse about your fear and talk about what can make you feel better.

3.      Low Lubrication: You may feel lesser vaginal lubrication as the estrogen levels in your body are much lesser.

#Suggestion: Use water based lubricants that are available at any drug store. This will help you to penetrate easily and enhance your sexual experience.

4.      Feelings Towards your Partner: You may have totally over looked your partner ever since you assumed your role as a mother. This might make your spouse feel neglected.

#Suggestion: Express your love towards your spouse and that nothing has changed. Involve him in baby activities. Have a designated time that you spend with your spouse on a regular basis.

5.      Lone time for sex: You may be conscious of your baby’s presence and may not feel comfortable being in a sexual act.

#Suggestion: You could use devices to monitor your baby while you can go to another room and enjoy some intimate time with your spouse. Invest in a crib!



Tags: #Sex-life #post-partum